There once was a boy who was terribly fat. He ate all his food from enormous vats. Within a pea, one he consumed without glee, lived an alien with the ability for the grant of a wish.
Upon entering his stomach, the creature called out with his promise of granting one wish, not three.
“Let me live and you’ll get anything you desire, although not true love, it’ll get me fired.”
“Then that is what I want, little thing in my stomach, decide quick before the acid makes you into nothing.”
The alien sighed, but allowed the wish.
The two of them are now husband and thing. Neither saw the eventuality of this it would bring, but tough shit, they’re in it now and make love where ever the alien fits.